Friendship

I have learned that a friend can be someone of any age not just within a year or two of my age.

I have learned that a friendship is not stopped by distance.

I have learned that a friend can be found in my family.

I have learned that my best friend makes for a great husband!

I have learned that life can not be lived without friends.

But I have also learned there is so much more about friendship that I have to learn.

Friendship needs time, needs love, needs vulnerability, needs grace.  Friendship needs those hard conversations that no one else will have with you, but don't judge you for being you.  Friends let you have the hard conversations with them knowing you won't judge them but know that you love them and that is why you are talking with them.

I have had some friends come and go in different seasons of life and moving across the country.  I have also had some friends who have stayed through the different seasons and when time and space separate us we can pick up as if it was just yesterday since we talked.

One of the things I value most about these friends that I have is knowing that in my time of need they will pray for me.  In my tine of joy they will praise God with me.  And even when they do not know what is going on they are praying.

I thank God for those who He has brought into my life to being me closer to Him, who have prayed for me, encouraged me, challenged me, loved me, helped me, had fun with me, laughed with me.  I thank God for my friends.

As iron sharpens iron, 
so a friend sharpens a friend.

Proverbs 27:17

God's Ways Are...

God's ways for my life are not what I tend to think they should be... They are so much BETTER.

God's ways in answering my prayers can be missed if I only look for what I want to see happen... But when I let go of my expectations I see God working in CRAZY but AMAZING ways I would have never imagined.

God's ways are not always easy... He takes me out of my comfort zone and TOGETHER we go on an ADVENTURE all the while showing me things that I would have never seen before.

God's ways are SIMPLE... I find that it is me who makes things more complicated than they really are.

God's ways are not when I want them... but if I can find anything to be PERFECT in my life it is God's timing, not mine.

As I continue to travel this life, God teaches me more about myself and what I am capable of doing with Him by my side, what I can do as I listen to Him, and mostly what He can do through me as I step out of the way and put my selfishness aside.

So I am learning that GOD'S WAYS ARE... GOOD!!

The Big 3-0

I am entering a new "season" of life. In a few days I turn 30. And going into the new age for me I enter it confused, scared, hurting, loved, blessed, humbled, insecure, excited, dependent on God, still learning to let go and let God do His thing. I am emotional, determined, unsure, and on a journey that I have no clue where it is going and how I am going to get "there".

I don't know what I have to offer or do, but yet know that God can do anything through me if I am willing and obedient - oh and patient waiting on His timing again.

It is funny how God teaches you lessons and you think that you get it only to be faced with it again in a new and different way to learn and grow, to again know God as He reveals Himself to you in a way that you can touch. For that I am excited for the pain and struggle I am so not!

In all this God is teaching me that it is okay to be content to being a wife and a mama. I don't keep the best house - there is dust on my desk right now and dishes that need to be done and laundry that have been in a basket for .... well I am not telling you :). But all of this is IMPORTANT, not that I didn't think it was before, but sometimes I get caught up in "things" and forget how blessed I am here learning and doing the job that is right in front of me, that these days will soon be gone to a new season of life to enjoy. I sometimes want more, want more praise, more to say that I have done something amazing but I am not seeing that I have done so much in loving and supporting Danny and taking care of the boys and training them to be men of character and men who love God. Not to mention what I want more of is really me, myself and I, and God is saying loud and clear that I don't need anymore of me but that I desperately need more of Him. To realize and truly live knowing He is all I need in my day.

So here I am, ready - I think, to go, to listen, to wait, to obey, to learn, to trust, to climb again to where God wants me to be and to really live each day knowing God is all I need and He provides abundantly.

"You are my God. I worship you. In my heart, I long for you, as I would long for a stream in a scorching desert. I have seen your power and your glory in the place of worship. Your love means more than life to me, and I praise you. As long as I live, I will pray to you." Psalms 63:1-4

New Name

So the other week I was helping out at Cody's school like I always do and one of the little girls wanted to talk to me and she called me Miss Cody. I thought it was cute.

I have enjoyed volunteering at Cody's class, and I think he likes it too. There have been a few adventures, many things that make me smile and remind me how blessed we are in life.

God and My Haircut

Last night I finally got my hair cut...it has been way to long. Anyways, I do not like finding a new person to do my hair because when I was younger I had a bad experience with a new person cutting my hair. Anyways I was trying to put that aside and a friend of mine has gotten a gift certificate for a particular place and had given it to me because she really likes who does her hair. So I gave it a try. And what did I get... a really bad haircut for way to much money. The color is really bad and looks like it has already grown out and the cut is uneven and choppy. I even found a few strands that had not been cut. Do this women's defense she did dry it curly so all of this went unnoticed until this morning when I straightened it and saw what a bad cut it is. Want to know how much a bad haircut costs.... $120. Before you freak out on me I did not pay that much for my hair and remember I had a gift card. But I also believe that God was protecting me because their credit card machines were down so she told me to bring in the money later. So I have not paid for this haircut and really it is not worth the amount the gift card was for but I am getting it fixed on Saturday. God worked that one out too. I know this may sound silly but He really did.

I called the lady who does my mom's hair because that is where I am staying right now and she said I could come in with my mom on Saturday. Keep in mind she is really busy and my mom has her scheduled quite a few months out. Anyways I called my mom and asked her about it and she said she just had her hair done and wasn't going to go back till July. So my mom called her back and for some reason she really did have my mom down on the schedule.... what was her response to that: Must have been a God thing.

So I know this is not a big thing like a house by the church but it is God reminding me that He IS TAKING CARE OF THINGS even the "little" things.

Here is a picture from my phone of my hair... you can see one side is longer than the other and how blond the front is. You can't really see how choppy it is but it is all going to be okay.

Change?!?

I know I have not blogged very much this year. My January has been a little different than I thought it was going to be. And I think February is going to be not what I thought either.

Danny and I are embarking on a new adventure full of changes. So here are some random thoughts I have found about change:

• it is uncomfortable
• it can hurt
• it does not affect just you
• it can be exciting
• it can bring a whole new batch of challenges
• it is the beginning of something new
• it can be confusing
• it can bring a new refreshing energy to life
• it allows opportunity for others to step up or step in
• it happens fast
• it is all okay when you keep your eyes on God and trust that He knows what He is doing and will take care of all the needs.

I will share more about this change that is going on in our lives later, but for now I am busy with the details of all that is going on. Thanks for all your support and prayers and remember that life is always changing if not it would not be so interesting.

What kind of change are you preventing in your life that needs to happen?

Thankful Heart

I know Thanksgiving has past. I wanted to post what I am thankful for so here it is in no order:

• a hard working, loving, amazing husband
• little boys giggles
• caring and giving friends
• family near and far
• yummy food
• a warm bed
• sweet kisses all day long from boys big and little
• many blessings from above
• hardships molding me to be a better person
• sisters who make the best friends
• cameras to capture life
• that look in a little boy's eye of pure joy and happiness
• hide and seek in the dark with candles lit
• high school girls who make me smile
• Friday morning gals
• reconnecting with long lost friends all over the world
• mothers who are wonderful friends
• love
• good heath
• simple things in life

I am sure if I sat here long enough there would be plenty more but this is a good list for now. So tell me what are you thankful for? leave me a comment.

don't know what to call this one...

Last night before I went to bed I read this verse and this is what I got out of it, enjoy. :)

"But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for my Savior; my God will hear me." Micah 7:7 (NIV)

"But me, I'm not giving up. I'm sticking around to see what God will do. I'm waiting for God to make things right. I'm counting on God to listen to me." Micah 7:7 (Message)

1. Do Not Give Up!!

We need to persevere. Know that you can do it, you can get through whatever you are going through. It reminded me of Psalm 138:8 (message) "Finish what you started in me God, Your love is eternal - don't quit on me now."

God is not going to give up on you so don't give up on Him.

2. Watch in Hope for the Lord.

He is moving, He is doing things. We just need to hold on to the hope that we have in Him. Jeremiah 29:11b says: "...I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. " We just need to trust Him

3. Wait for God My Savior.

Wait ... that is a hard one, really, because we live in a world that tells us we shouldn't have to wait for anything. But we are missing out of a lot when we don't wait. It is okay to slow life down, maybe that is all you need really, life goes by to fast and we are to busy to really enjoy what is really important. And sometimes that means people...

4. See What God Will Do...

Open your eyes... really. In the midst of hard times there are still blessings all around you. And to be honest we miss what God is going to to because our eyes are not open to see it. Or we have expectations and miss what God is going to do. How many times when we pray and ask God to help us we come with a plan already in our hands. When we say we want God's way do we really mean it? Because if so it means that most of the time your way won't happen, but that is okay because God's way is so much more amazing than what we could have ever found.

5. God Will Make Things Right!!!

I think the key to this one is things will be made right in His time and what is right in His eyes, not mine... To be honest I don't always know the big picture but God does, so I have to trust that He knows what is best and what is right and that may not be what I think. I need to be okay with that...again come with no expectations.

6. God Will Hear Me and Listen to Me!!!

So talk to Him, pour out your heart, cry out to Him. He is listening and He wants you to turn to Him. So why don't you? Why are you to busy going to your friends or family first like they have the answers or can fix things....I know there is comfort in going to friends and family but really I think we need to go to God first. He can help you sort through all that is going on.

Well that is pretty much what I got slammed with last night :) I finish with this that I wrote in my journal:

Hard times refine us, shape us, change us to be who are are - someone who is better because God loves us with an everlasting love, a love that won't leave you the way you are, a love that knows your potential and guides you to that potential of someone remarkable.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year...

I love the holiday seasons... don't you?

Love Each Other...

Why do I make it so complicated?

It is just so simple

~ LOVE ~

Caring love

Giving love

Serving love

Unconditional love

Sacrificial love

Unending love

Just love

Love God by loving others.

Now, not later;

Here, not there;

Him or her, not them.

Just Love ~

Matthew 22:37-40 (Message)

Jesus said, "'Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.' This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: 'Love others as well as you love yourself.' These two commands are pegs; everything in God's Law and the Prophets hangs from them."

Uncomfortable...A Way of Life?

Have you ever been so uncomfortable that it became comfortable? I know that may not make sense, but like when your foot falls asleep from how you are sitting. It becomes uncomfortable but you are still comfortable, and you know if you try to move your foot how much more uncomfortable you will become when you wake your foot up.

But what about life? We don't like to be uncomfortable. We don't like to be in uncomfortable situations, or conversations. We like things to work out smoothly. We don't like to squirm or look foolish.

As a Christian I wonder are we supposed to live comfortable? Are we supposed to have life work out? I know that it doesn't. But why do we think that because we are following Christ that it should? I thought that being a Christian meant being Christ like and Christ did not have a "comfortable" life like we think we should.

Take for instance when Jesus was at the well and the Samaritan woman came to get water. That was an uncomfortable situation. Jesus was resting and here comes a woman, a Samaritan woman. Jews did not talk to Samaritans at all. So maybe a little awkward but she is coming by herself when no one else was going to be there for a reason. She was living a life of shame and Jesus knew that. Little uncomfortable I think for both the woman and Jesus. But what does Jesus do? He asks her for a drink of water. He a Jew asked a Samaritan woman for water. But He didn't stop there. He took time to say I know how you are living your life, but there is hope for you. She left and went to get other people in the town and they came and listened to Jesus and believed. It all started with an uncomfortable situation and conversation.

What about the time when another woman was caught in adultery and was brought in front of Jesus? He was at the temple and had just sat down to teach to the people who were around Him. And thrown at His feet is a woman with none or little clothes on crying knowing she is about to be stoned to death. Not only was she thrown at His feet the Pharisees said to Jesus "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law of Moses commanded us to stone such a woman. Now what do you say?" (John 8:4-5 NIV) The Pharisees were trying to trap Jesus not in a private setting but in front of a lot of people on a big issue. I would say this was a little uncomfortable for Jesus and probably for the woman and maybe others who just wanted to hear Jesus teach. But no one moved, they waited. Jesus could not get out of this one even if He wanted to. But I like what He said to them, "If any of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Talk about turning the tables on them...now who is the one that is uncomfortable? Probably the woman still. But now the Pharisees are uncomfortable, their trap just got turned on them and they knew they were not without sin. So they left. I wonder did they take their stone with them or drop it on the ground? After the last person left Jesus says to the woman "I do not condemn you. Go now and leave your life of sin."

Another event that was an uncomfortable time was when four friends of a man who was paralysed lowered him on a mat through the roof of a home where Jesus was teaching. So who is uncomfortable here? Maybe the man who is paralysed...it never said if he wanted to be lowered and healed. I am sure who's ever house that was that now had a hole large enough to fit a man through it. And sure uncomfortable for Jesus, he was in the middle of teaching to all these people when this man appeared from the roof. But Jesus saw the faith of this man's friends and said to the man, "Friend, your sins are forgiven...get up, take your mat and go home." (Luke 5:20, 24 NIV) So he did. (There was another uncomfortable situation in the middle of this story you can go and read it in Luke 5:17-26)

Here were three situations and conversations that probably were uncomfortable for Jesus and others involved but what and how did Jesus respond? The Samaritan woman He showed her LOVE. He loved her enough to not just talk to her but give her hope and a chance for a new life. The woman caught in adultery He showed her GRACE. He knew the law and that she deserved justice but said "I don't condemn you...leave your life of sin" (John 8:11 NIV) He gave her another chance. And the man who was paralysed Jesus showed him MERCY. He didn't have to forgive this man of his sins, Jesus could have just healed him and said go on with your better life. But He didn't Jesus covered everything, the sin and being paralysed.

What amazes me the most is that Jesus welcomed uncomfortable situations and conversations knowing that it would give someone the chance to be changed by love, or changed by grace, or changed by mercy.

That is how I want to live my life. Uncomfortable. Especially if that means someone's life can be better because I chose to be uncomfortable for a moment.

Bubbles ...

Now that the weather is warming up the boys love to go outside and play with bubbles. What is it about a simple thing that can entertain us by either blowing bubbles - which can be very therapeutic - or chasing bubbles to pop.

Learning to blow bubbles can be very tricky. You have to blow just hard enough to get the bubble out but be careful if you blow to hard you pop the bubble before it can even take off.

But when you figure out how much to blow you get a cool bubbles that floats in the air.

Bubbles are so cool.

Happily Ever After?

I love fairy tales. My favorite is Beauty and the Beast. However all of them seem to start the same: "Once Upon a Time..." and end the same: "...and they all lived happily ever after." Awww isn't that sweet. But realistically what does happily ever after look like?

Is it a life of well, perfection? Do they go along with their lives with no more trials or hardships to work through? I don't think that happily ever after means perfectly ever after.

So then what does it mean? I think that real life throws curve balls our way to solidify that happily ever after. It is how we work together through hardships that takes us to happily ever after.

Think back on any kind of relationship that you've had where you and that person faced hardship together. Doesn't matter if you faced it together or whether it was between you two. If you both made the commitment to work hard and face it no matter what comes, more than likely your relationship was strengthened. You went deeper in that relationship to another level of respect, love, trust, appreciation of each other.

There are times when this doesn't happen but why? Sometimes people are not willing to fight for relationships, fight to have a happily ever after.

So what am I getting at. Happily ever after is not just something that happens overnight, it is something to work hard for and to fight for. Something that you will be proud of and never let go.

I know for me that is what I want, and am going to fight for.

The Perfect Resting Spot

I love to rest. I love to put on comfy clothes and crawl under covers and rest or I like to find a peaceful place in the mountains or at the beach. I think sometimes in our busy lives most people do not take the time that they need to rest. We go and go and go like the energizer bunny till we think we cannot make it any more. Some people keep going even after their bodies try to tell them to slow down. For me I really don't have a choice. I was 7 years old when I found out that I suffered from migraines. So at an early age I was forced to slow down my life and rest when I needed it and even sometimes when I wanted to get away from things.

So where is your favorite place to rest. For my 2 year old it is my lap. He has been known to lay on my lap when he is really tired at the dinner table, the rodeo, and even yesterday at the pumpkin patch. We had just finished lunch and Cole wanted to look at the water (he loves water), so we quietly sat by a tree and looked out at the water. It was not long until he laid his head on my lap. If we had nothing else that we had to do that day, I would have sat there all afternoon and let him take a nap there. It was really peaceful.

I think no matter how old you are or how busy you are, sometimes you just need to stop and rest. It is actually good for you to do. But find a place where all distractions are gone and you can just listen to silence, or a river running, or birds, something that is not apart of your everyday sounds. You might find that it makes your days easier and you are a little happier.

So where is your perfect resting place?

Praise Him in This Storm

This week has kinda been a crummy week for me. I have thought about blogging about it but I just never had a quiet moment long enough to put my thoughts together. Even right now it is not all that quiet. Yesterday I was talking to my mom about my week and she suggested that instead of writing about the terrible things this week that I write praises. So for everything that has been hard or depressing I will write a praise about the situation.

Our Situation ....We have a job where Danny has freedom
Bakersfield ....It is still considered Southern California :) and it has cooled off.
Amy and Dave .... The wisdom they have now to pass on
Chris Champion's cancer .... He can still smile and know God is good
Dawn Champion going through this again .... John is caner free right now!!!
Not allowed to eat certain foods .... I am loosing weight and so is Pomie!!!
No girl friends close to me that I can talk about anything to .... Mom, Michele, Amy (my BFF)
Dirt not just dust to clean .... I have a beautiful house that the boys can grow in
Bob still has not found a job .... Pomie has someone who loves her and is happy
The lack of Youth Workers .... Who we do have are awesome and what we need
Feel like I can't do things right .... God still loves me and cares for me

These are a few of the things that have I have been wrestling with God this week (more of the major ones, the other are just annoyances). Even though things can look bad or I don't understand why things are going the way they are I have to continue to remember that God is in control and things will work out for His glory. He is walking right beside me and when the times come that I don't think I can keep going He picks me up and gets me through. He has done it earlier this year and continues to even if I haven't spent time with him. No matter what happens or what you do or don't do God never turns His back on you.

Will you praise Him in your storm?

The Car Ride Home

Cody, this year is in speech therapy due to problems with his ears and he couldn't hear very well when he was younger (his hearing is perfect now). He attends a local elementary school and it is more like pre kindergarten for him. He really enjoys his class and is making new friends and experiencing all sorts of things like using scissors to cut paper, using a knife to put frosting on a birthday cookie, and trying new foods that he won't try at home. He loves his teachers Mrs. Tickle and Miss Tammy. So what does Mommy love the most about this? Not the free schooling he is getting, not the two hours a day two times a week I have one less kid, not all the fun projects that are hand crafted by a talented three year old (although I love seeing him be creative). No, what I look forward to the most is picking him up and listening to Cody talk about his day all the way home. He is so expressive and excited to tell me everything about the past two hours of his life. Each time I pick him up he gets a little bit older.

These tiny moments in life could easily have been missed if I answered my cell phone, or listened to the radio, or was in such a hurry to get home I couldn't pay attention to my big little guy. These are things that have become so much apart of our lives that we don't realize what we are missing or not paying attention to when they consume us.

When Cody was born I remember not thinking twice about missing that TV show or movie or phone call because I was playing with Cody or just watching him. I think that once a month or once a quarter, whenever it is needed, we should sit down and evaluate what it is that consumes our time. What are we saying is important to us? Are we making those we love wait till we are finished with what we are doing? We live in a time of busyness and endless distractions and total chaos that we need to make sure that those who are important to us know they are more important because at the end of the day you can never have that time back.

Make the time to enjoy the little things in life.

Welcome to My Beautiful Chaos...

I have finally caved in and joined the blogging world. I am not that good of a writer or journal very much but it is something that I am going to try. I have been thinking about blogging for a while now and was still trying to decide what to blog about. My life can be so chaotic at times, so I thought that my blog will just reflect my life. But in the midst of the chaos wonderful things are happening all around me. Like the number of days and memories added to my marriage with someone who amazes me, seeing the beauty of life through a child eyes (one almost 4 years old and one 2 1/2 years old). But most importantly seeing how God is taking care of me every moment and how He cares about my beautiful chaos.

So welcome to my beautiful chaos.